In-Security - Spanner in the Works

Having unarmed guests at your function is essential for it to run smoothly.

Our In-Security guards are highly trained in detecting potential modern weaponry. (Many of our staff are SAS failures, apparently).

In today's hi-tech society, small bazookas can easily be covertly concealed in an earring, a laser-guided rocket launcher with up to 20 missiles could be controlled from an innocent cigarette case, even a harmless looking umbrella could be a lethal blowpipe, and if you think it doesn't happen, then think again.

In-Security gives you peace of mind and guarantees that none of the above will slip through our system, without us first giving them a thorough inspection. This will leave you to do what you do best, which is to organise high profile parties.

We can supply a security system anywhere, of any size and, depending on budget, up to eight security guards (8).

A standard procedure includes four In-Security guards (4). All props are freestanding and battery operated.

	Frank Dankworth - Chief In-Security guard for nineteen years and seven months. Married, lives in Derby with his two children and their Staffs bull terrier, Collymore.
	Clifford Boon - First petty officer in - charge, aged 38, lives in Mansfield with his mom. Has recently joined us after being made redundant from The Molehill shopping centre, Tibshelf.
	Steve Strife - Junior acting officer in-charge. Strong swimmer and qualified first aider. Recently received an award for bravery for his heroic actions during the Barnsley avalanche incident. Lovely lad, his shoes are always shiny clean.
	Val (Stickler) Limfnode - Communications Officer in-charge. Single, ex prison officer at Stag Hope Womens' Correctional Facility, Texas. Enjoys Rugby, Fishing and motor sports. You do not argue with our Val.

Watch with delight as your bemused guests go through the In-Security routine. After registering their name with Val, they then pass through our airport style security detector, which we have control of, should the client wish to target any specific guests.

When the alarm sounds, our guards take the surprised guest to one side for a closer look at their hidden weaponry.

They do this by using some very odd bleeping instruments to discover the hidden cause.

Often a guard will break from the main pack bawling distorted instructions through a megaphone; another may skirt the room with an army torch.

When all of the guests are safely through the In-security check-in, most of them will have a tale to tell of their unusual experience.

At some venues guests can watch their friends and colleagues go through these hilarious and unnecessary procedures.

We can supply spoof guests who join the queue and have to pass through the equipment. This gives us the opportunity to create even more of a scene, as we discover their hidden articles.

"I really believed that my shoe had a secret compartment. Very convincing and extremely funny"
Mike Maxwell - The Brown Agency

"Every time the electronic thing passed over my left arm pit, it bleeped and I was accused of concealing a grenade inside it. Ridiculous insane fun".
Pete Bates - IPH Litho

"Several radio calls had to be made to check my identity, even though I am very famous"
Vanessa Feltz - Big celebrity

Recent Clients include

The Brown Agency
Wragg & Co
Reynard Racing
Giroflex
KPMG
IPH Litho
Claire's brothers 21st birthday bash

Small Arms Detector

	Recent weapons found
	Ice pick Afro razor comb Sawn off Pea-shooter Futuristic laser pointer thing M-13 rapid fire assault pistol Tiny radio equipment

In-Security is perfect Front-End Queue Management Entertainment
(F.E.Q.M.E)
Please telephone 01905 353551